Wednesday, May 6, 2009

The Agony/Delight of Online Package Tracking

I just ordered something and began tracking it online - immediately. Of course, it's still sitting on a shelf somewhere and my credit card is still being processed; but a part of me believes that it the online tracking will tell me something. Maybe something like "a stockboy is opening the door to the supply room" or "the package is being wrapped in cellophane." I would even accept, "the delivery truck driver is flirting with your receptionist" and "your package just turned over on its side as the delivery truck took a sharp right turn." Maybe the tracking info should just fictionalize what happens to a package and give me such updates every five minutes so I can get on with my life - which I won't be able to do until the package arrives.

I can see myself getting up in the middle of the night to track the package and even asking my wife to check on it and give me updates while in the shower. (That is, while I am in the shower. It wouldn't make sense if she were in the shower; that's just stupid. It only makes sense if she gives me package tracking updates while I am showering; that is totally logical.)

During this process I usually get so distracted that I download the"ReLoad Every" Firefox addon that refreshes the screen automatically so I can leave a browser window up all day that updates every minute with my delivery status. Absolutely no mystery film or haunted house documentary could possibly keep my eyes peeled to the screen for so long. But when I am waiting for a package I will look at the dull tracking screen for days. Anyone else have this problem?

2 comments:

  1. If you want a satisfying delivery tracking experience, order a pizza from Domino's online. They actually do go through every step.. "Your pizza was prepared by Dave at 5:13pm...Dave placed your pizza in the oven at 5:14pm... Your pizza was placed in a heat-wave bag at 5:21pm...Your pizza was sent out for delivery at 5:22pm." It really is satisfying.

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  2. I used to do that. Still do with important packages. I remember ordering a computer online a few years ago. I was glued to the tracking screen. Then it arrived, and I discovered the order had been messed up, and had to send it back. I tracked it all the way back and again when they sent me the correct parts.

    As for Domino's: now I want to order online from them just to see this work! LOL

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