Monday, July 28, 2008

The Udder Horror that is Chick-Fil-A

Nothing I write about seems to make my readers as angry as my hatred for Chick-Fil-A. There are a lot of things about me you guys hate. My Nazi-like right-wing views. My unfairly negative reviews of overrated films like Batman Begins and Good Will Hunting. Also, U2 sucks and I think Wild at Heart is boring and off the mark. But none of that will bother you as much as my description of the udder horror that is Chick-Fil-A.

Five dollars for a sandwich? And it's barely a sandwich. For that price I can go to Wendy's and get five cheeseburgers. And, get this, that $5 sandwich only comes with two pickles and a bland piece of chicken. They charge extra for the vegetables! $0.99 burgers come with all of this and even bacon; sometimes there are even double cheeseburgers for a dollar. The Chick-Fil-A sandwich is just some carbs and light protien while the other, cheaper, burger is like an entire meal. And you can get 5 of them to feed five people for the price of one sucky Chick-Fil-A sandwich. The nutrition and economics just don't work out.

I already know what you are thinking. I hear this all the time and have been hearing it from you for years, "But they have sweet tea!"

Give me a break. What kind of country-fried RV pro-wrestling viewing slack-jawed yokels find sweat tea enticing? What, is the Dairy Queen out of sugar packets? You're going to spend extra money on nominal food so you can have some teenager sweeten your tea for you?

So, there is no reason for me to go to this place. On the inside, they look like they forgot to choose a paint color and left each wall white. Then, they filled the place with a million screaming children. Worst. Restaurant. Ever.


  1. I think you are stupid. I work at Chick-fil-a and although I will admit the sandwich is not cheep, it isnt 5 freakin dollars, its like maybe $3... So get yer facts straight next time.

    Oh, and a cheeseburger is not chicken.... but good try.

  2. Ok, you're an idiot. At no point did he say that a cheeseburger is a chicken sandwich. He was merely pointing out that the burger is a better deal than that of the chicken sandwich.

    And he is also aware that the sandwich alone does not cost $5, but he is trying to make a point by adding an exaggeration to his statement. And it's "your," not "yer."